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I'd Mildew You

I'd Mildew You - Main image
$10.50 $35.00 In stock

Category: Limited Edition

Limited, textured green-tile sunnies w/ dark green gradient lenses that are more exciting than an all-original mid-century bathroom. What insidious soap-scum secrets lurk deep within those grout lines? You'd scour this bathroom SO hard.

Customer Reviews (4.7 / 5 · 43 reviews)

Brian L. ★★★★★

The textured green tile pattern is even better in person, and the dark green gradient lenses make everything look like a retro film. Perfect for when I want my sunglasses to be the most interesting thing in the room.

Edward ★★★★★

I was hoping these would look as good in person as they do online, and they totally deliver—the dark green gradient lenses make everything feel like a vintage film. The tile texture is way more detailed than I expected, and it catches light in a cool way. Only wish they came with a hard case for the price, but the style is worth it.

Jacob ★★★★★

The textured frame has a surprisingly nice grip, so they don't slide off my face when I'm lounging. The color combo really pops, making me feel like I'm wearing a piece of retro art.

Joseph ★★★★★

The dark green gradient lenses are dreamy, cutting glare without muting color vibrancy. I half-expected them to feel cheap given the playful design, but the tile texture is surprisingly refined. Perfect for adding a retro, moody twist to any outfit.

James B. ★★★★★

The textured tile frame is such a clever design—it captures the retro bathroom vibe perfectly. The dark green gradient lenses cut glare beautifully while still looking playful, and the fit is surprisingly comfortable for a statement piece. Already getting compliments every time I wear them out.

Hannah V. ★★★★★

I was nervous the green gradient lenses might be too dark, but they actually make the world look like a cool, vintage travel poster. The textured frame feels incredibly sturdy, no flimsy plastic here. Already got three compliments on my first walk.

Ella O. ★★★★★

The tile texture on these frames is surprisingly satisfying to run my fingers over, and the dark green gradient lenses cut glare perfectly without making everything look muddy. They’ve already gotten me compliments from strangers twice in one week.

Steven W. ★★★★★

I was nervous about how these would look on my face, but the dark green gradient lenses cut glare beautifully while still being subtle enough for daily wear. The tile texture is surprisingly comfortable against my temples, not sharp at all.

Carter G. ★★★★★

The textured tile arms feel just like real ceramic—so fun to run my fingers over. These have instantly become my go-to for sunny days, and the dark green gradient is subtle but striking. Really glad I snagged a pair before they sold out.

Hannah ★★★★★

The green gradient lenses are even richer in person, perfectly pairing with the tile texture to give off a playful retro vibe. I’ve gotten three compliments just wearing them to grab coffee, and they block glare really well without making everything look too dark.